Public School

Why I will NEVER put my children in daycare!

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We laugh when we see a character in a movie forget their young child (always a child who is 5 or older mind you) in the car.

We never see someone forget the baby… Why? – because that wouldn’t be good TV.

We cringe when we read the stories about someone’s pet being left in the car and we feel the person who broke their car window with a rock or called the police was perfectly justified in doing so. We may even cheer about it. We certainly retweet or share the story so that everyone knows just how serious this problem is!

… but aren’t our children more important than our pets?

Most parents get very angry when someone says they shouldn’t put their children in daycare or public school…

But do those parents stop to consider that these helpful suggestions are not in fact an attack on their parenting, but an effort to make them stop and really think about what is truly best for their child?

NO.

This is what makes people forget their children in the car when they carry groceries inside. This is what makes people feel it is OK to leave a child in their car with the engine running while they run in to pay for their fuel. This is what makes people brush off their children when they say they are being bullied in school. And this is what, in my own humble opinion, has led to a most horrific tragedy that is apparently occurring all across the US – across all lines of age, income, education, mental capacity and experience.

If you’re still unsure what I’m referring to, please click on the picture above and read the article.

I would love to say that it is ONLY the parents’ faults but that isn’t true.

I would love to say that we can find a way to end this string of senseless deaths but the truth is – there really is no hope for that until we, as a country, change our ways… change our outlook on parenting… change the way we think and act about our precious children.

 

I see them every day! Posts begging people to adopt a dog or a cat that is scheduled to be euthanized. Posts demanding the cruelty end at puppy mills. Posts demanding harsher punishments for people who mistreat their pets. Posts calling for us to break windows or call police when we see a pet locked in a car on a warm day…

 

Where are the posts calling for harsher punishment for the parents who leave their innocent CHILD in a locked car on a hot day!

No. Instead… the article I read, talks about how the lawyers and judges rule that they will punish themselves enough just living with their guilt.

Will they?

 

A relative of mine, who shall remain nameless except to the family and friends who already know about it, suggested that I abort my son. I was single, having walked out of an extremely abusive relationship but I was not 16. I wasn’t even 21. I turned 24 the year my sweet little boy was born. And I felt sick to realize that I share blood with this person.

My mother has been essentially shunned by more than a few friends and most of our family over the years because she “allows me to sit at home and do nothing” and she does not “make me put those kids in school“. There is no use wasting our breath in telling them that my children are flourishing – being schooled at home. And there is no point in wasting our breath defending me – although she does. At every turn she tells them that I work harder than she does and that she doesn’t know how I get everything done that I do in a day.

She is my biggest cheerleader, my strongest advocate and my best friend! And without her, my life could be a cold, dark and dreary place with absolutely no joy. (without her, I probably wouldn’t have my precious children… and without her prayers and guidance I would have moved farther and farther away from God, instead of having the close relationship I have with HIM today).

 

So why do I begin this article with the proclamation that I will never put my children in daycare?

 

Simply this:

I believe, and I am in the minority I’m sure, that our society has successfully made our children less important to us because they tell us over and over and over again, until it becomes a rhetoric in our own head, that we NEED that extra income… we NEED me-time… we NEED a life that is separate from our family… that we NEED to work because we should not have to give up our own identity just because we have children…

That we NEED to allow a woman  to have absolute control over her own body…

And that we NEED to let public schools decide what our children do and do not need to learn.

 

And that, in my humble opinion, is why we are losing this battle. We have lost sight of the fact that our children are only with us for a short time. Some parents get 18 years, some get 21, some get 2… or less.

… no one knows how many years or days or minutes they will live.

So I have two suggestions…

1. If you want to have your own life before you have children, then DO IT! Get it all out of your system and THEN have children, when you can focus on them and give them ALL of your time. Because you never know how much time you will actually get with them!

2. Do not go around acting like you are married – and you know EXACTLY what I mean, before you are READY for marriage and children! Because there is nothing worse for a child than to think that you did not start out wanting them!

 

And give home-school a serious consideration. No, it may not be the right choice or the best choice or even a possible choice (at this time in your life) but it is worth every consideration. Your CHILD is worth the consideration!

 

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Categories: Blogging, Children, Community, Daycare, Homeschool, MY Country, not what it used to be, parenting, Public School | Tags: , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Lesson plans and Life studies: A New Year, A new philosophy.

Matthew 18 3 KJVI sit here thinking about the past year, wondering where it went and I realize something. I have lived my life too much in the past for far too long. I think we all do – whether we mean to or not. We worry that we’re not getting enough done, or that we’re not getting everything done that we want to do. We spend insane amounts of money on insurance and retirement plans for the future but it’s the past we hold onto. It’s the past that we cling to with frightened fingers while we peek through nearly closed eyelids at the future.

I look at my 10 year old and I realize that he has one advantage over me. He doesn’t hold onto the past and he isn’t afraid of the future. He lives in the moment. The Bible tells us…

“Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.” – Matthew 18:3

Now I don’t think that means we all need to be silly or immature and I don’t think it means that we won’t get into Heaven if we’re not 100% innocent but I do think it means something very important and we all need to give it a lot more consideration than we typically do.

Most people look at that phrase and think it means we have to trust like little children or we have to be vulnerable like little children but I don’t think it’s either of those things.

Ironically, I think the world actually has the best idea of what Jesus is telling us here. For so many years we “Christians” have scoffed at the idea that our children are more important than anything else in life. We have convinced ourselves that we are doing the right thing when we work hard to provide for them and we’ve convinced ourselves that the best way to educate them is to put them in a school with other kids their own age and we tell ourselves that all of these things we do are for the best, are in their best interest, that we’re doing it for them.

But are we really?

At best, we have eighteen years with our children. After that, they may live at home, they may stay with the family, they may even bow to their parent’s will but they’re no longer a child. And, for a lot of “children”, they stop acting and thinking like children long before their 18th birthday.

So what are we doing? What are we thinking? And what should we be doing, thinking?

Making money is important and providing a good education is essential… BUT neither of those things means a thing if we don’t understand what this verse is telling us.

Like so many of the passages in the Bible, this one can easily be taken out of context too. And I think that’s one of the biggest problems with the typical way we interpret the meaning here. And you have to go further than even the verses immediately around it too. Go back farther than the begnning of chapter 18 and go farther forward than the end of the same chapter. And, at the same time, you have to read between the lines. It’s difficult for us to look at those words and derive the actual meaning from them. Most of us forget that He came into a world that was very different than the one we live in today. There are places in the world that are similar to the Bethlehem Jesus was born in and in the many cities He visited as He spoke and taught the words of His Father but even those places are slowly losing the grip on their old ways.

We think we know better. We think we have the answers, the technology, the knowledge. What we are missing is the wisdom. We as adults, are missing the wisdom that I can see in the eyes of my 7 year old daughter. So many parents are shocked when their children make simple statements that are extraordinarily insightful but it’s really not that shocking when you think about it. In fact, what is shocking is that we wonder where it came from. We wonder why and how they have such insight at such a tender young age.

But Jesus taught in the temple when He was 12. Can you believe that? He was 12. And, at twelve, He was immeasurably wise. He knew what His Father expected of Him… already.

In my humble opinion, He began His ministry then. Actually, He really began His ministry the night He was born. Or perhaps it would be more accurate to say that His ministry actually began before He was born, with the prophets that foretold of His birth.

And I think the thing we miss most often is this:

We are all little children in His eyes. Jesus had a unique perspective that no one can possibly appreciate fully. He was born into a frail human body and He grew up in that frail human body just like we all do. I can’t begin to comprehend God’s plan – no one can but I do know that part of that plan was to send a part of Himself down to Earth. And I think that is one of the more brilliant portions of His plan. He sent to us a piece of Himself and He did it in such a quiet unassuming way. Absolutely nothing about Jesus conception and birth was spectacular and yet, everything about it was so far beyond spectacular, it’s difficult for people to honestly believe it.

But in His eyes, we are children. We are His children and we are innocent in the way that we don’t fully understand everything about how the world works. We don’t know everything about His plans and we’re really not capable of understanding if we did.

What’s my point? What is the message that the world has gotten that we, so often, miss?

Children are the most important thing in the world! Children are our responsibility, our gift and our legacy. We can make all the money in the world and it doesn’t make a bit of difference if we mess up raising our children. We can advance in our chosen profession to the very top but if we miss our children growing up, it’s all worthless.

We have such a short time, so few years to spend with them, to teach them, to train them up in the way they should go and then our time is up and their turn begins. Our children are our legacy and they are the ONLY thing that matters in this life while they are young.

They are a precious gift that is too often squandered, taken for granted and ignored.

God bless the parents who understand this already and are doing everything they can to parent the right way.

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I am sorry if any of the content is inappropriate.

Categories: Bible Study, Blogging, Children, holidays, Homeschool, parenting, Public School | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Is Passive Aggression Abuse?

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This is something I feel is a very important issue for moms to keep an eye out for.

This is something I feel very strongly about. And personally, I feel that passive aggression can be abuse. Not all of it obviously but often abuse is in the eye of the abused. And sometimes, what looks like abuse to one person will not look like abuse to others (on the flip side of that are the rare exceptions when what looks like abuse to others is actually NOT abuse… it’s rare but it does happen).

Yes, I speak from experience – and when I say that, I mean that I have been the subject of conversations between people who had absolutely nothing to do with the original “incident” that started out as mildly passive aggressive and went all the way to people wanting to find me and beat me up over something as simple as a difference in lifestyle choice.

Yes, you read that right… a lifestyle choice. That’s it.

I have also been the subject of more than one verbal attack over my choice in religion/literature/music/parenting/clothing choice/etc… Everyone has an opinion about everything people do and unfortunately, some people are determined to make sure you know that their opinion is right, your opinion is wrong and that you should change sides immediately.

Just one of many examples: I did not enjoy high-school. That experience started out well enough, surprisingly. However, a change in schools and income level made my high-school life somewhere between that joke about the toilet paper and the one about the chocolate Easter bunnies.

In other words, not fun.

Since high-school, I have been through two rather nasty divorces and several other failed relationships, none of which were entirely anyone’s fault. But it is difficult to make yourself stay with someone who thinks you are their verbal or physical punching bag, And, for some reason, a lot of people don’t see Psychological or Emotional abuse as actual abuse unless there’s some physical thrown in there as well but let me assure you, IT IS abuse and I have had more than my fair share of experience with passive-aggressive behavior in those type of situations.

Which is one reason I try so hard NOT to do it myself.

Mothers: it is so very important to keep a close monitor on what your children are doing online, what movies they’re watching, what books they’re reading. I’m not talking about control. I’m talking about common sense and safety. You can’t spout this nonsense about giving your children their freedom and then get upset when they are bullied to death or worse, bully someone to death.

There are too many true stories about a teen or even a pre-teen who commits suicide over things said to them and about them online.

Thankfully I was not online much when I was in high-school. If I had been in the middle of some of the conversations I have to deal with now… then, I probably wouldn’t be sitting here typing this right now. Because my peers were not my friends.

So I implore you parents: Please monitor your children closely. Make sure you know who they are talking to online, what they are talking about and then make sure you take the time to discuss anything that could be misconstrued or misunderstood with them until you’re sure they know what is real and true.

And above all else, PLEASE make sure they know how loved they are.

GOD BLESS!

Disclaimer: I have no control over the ads you may see below. I am sorry if any of the content is inappropriate.

God Bless You!

Categories: Children, Homeschool, not what it used to be, Online Safety, parenting, Public School | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Are We Forcing Our Children to Grow Up Too Fast? (Part 2)

FAIR WARNING! PG-13 material can be found in the following article.

What can we learn from this?

Is the question I left hanging last post.

What have you learned from it? Have you done your own Bible study to substantiate my suppositions? Have you talked these ideas over with your family, with your children? Or did you just wait for the next post?

Well, this is my answer.

I think we are forcing children to grow up too fast.

And I am not the only one who thinks so. toddlers-300

consumingkidsconsuming-kids-image

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The real question is why.

I don’t think it is actually any of the reasons I proposed in my last post. I think the answer is very different and much more frightening.

I think the reason we are forcing our children to grow up too fast is that we are slowly letting go of our children.

Think about that.

We let schools teach our children more an more about everyday life and living and at younger and younger ages all the time. Children used to go off to school when they were 8 or even 10. Now they start at 3. And now teachers are responsible for everything from potty training and tying their shoes to teaching them about how to get a loan or balance their checkbook to how sex works and what to do when it works a little too well.

 

brave-new-worldYears ago I saw a movie called “Brave New World”.

If you’ve seen it you know what is was about but for those who don’t, It was about a city where every single person took a “drug” called Soma. The people in this city were classified as Alpha, Beta and Gamma and did jobs accordingly. “Safe Sex” took on a whole new meaning. Everyone was responsible for being as promiscuous as possible, for taking their version of “the morning-after” pill and for donating their genetic material regularly. Babies were not “born”, they were “grown’ in special incubators. There were no parents – teachers were responsible for teaching the children everything that a parent would today. As a matter of fact, “Parent”, “Mother” and “Father” were bad words that carried heavy consequences. And death was celebrated. Basically human life held absolutely no weight. Sad.

 

 

Even more sad is the very real possibility that we are headed this way ourselves.

Prescriptions are given for any little ailment. Teachers are as important in many ways as parents themselves and sex is becoming more and more about entertainment and less about the continuation of our species. It is also becoming “the norm” for people to be promiscuous. As we advance medically, we may be able to overcome most STDs but having our society go the way of the one in “Soma” would be a far worse thing than a few STDs, in my humble opinion.

So ask yourself this?Holding hands

Are you being a parent or are you letting others do it for you?

 

 

 

Internet Safety

 

 

Are you teaching your children the things they need to know to make it in life?

 

And, are you teaching them to be responsible, moral people with a good relationship with God?

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Are you doing a regular Bible study with your family? Shouldn’t you start?

 

God Bless You and your family!

Disclaimer: I have no control over the ads you may see below. I am sorry if any of the content is inappropriate.

God Bless You!

Categories: Children, Daycare, Homeschool, MY Country, parenting, Proud Citizen, Public School, USA | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Are We Forcing Our Children to Grow Up Too Fast? (Part 1)

– You’ve heard it before. I know I have.

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Both of my children (7 and 10) want a cell-phone already

 

 

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My 7-year old daughter wanted to wear makeup TWO almost three years ago

 

“Kids are different today…”

 

 

 

 

 

“Kids grow up faster today than they used to…”

 

10 year old model

10 Year Old Model…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“The world is different now…”

 

 

 

But is it true?

Recently I have delved in to Bible study (REAL Bible study). Yes, I am one of millions of people who has grown up in church without ever really studying my Bible. I’ve heard all the stories so why bother?

Well I’ll tell you why.

There is a whole wide world of difference between the “stories: we heard as kids and the full, honest, in-depth accounting of the lives of the people who lived in Bible times. I could give you a million examples but for the sake of time and sanity, I’ll stick with just the one.

If you read The Book from the very beginning, especially if you know a bit about past civilizations and extinct civilizations from a world history viewpoint, you will see that the people in the Bible are not very different from people today… maybe not different at all. Yes we have internet now and we carry around tiny computers in our pockets but the same sins still exist. We haven’t thought up anything different from the people of the past, we just see more of it up close and personal thanks to Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr, WordPress, Blogger, Instagram, MySpace, Facebook and too many online news outlets to mention.

Amazing that we have come so far in so many ways while, in so many other ways, we’re still in the exact same place as our ancestors.

So the question is: Are we forcing our children to grow up too quickly? And if we are, why?

Are children growing up too fast because of how the world has changed?Internet Safety

– If you read what I wrote above, you’ll know that I do not believe this to be the case. Same world, same people, different toys…

 

 

 

 

Is it because children are so much more mature than they used to be?

toddlers-and-tiaras– Certainly this is not the reason. If anything, people are more foolish than the people of the past. We certainly do stupid things at a much younger age than the people in the Bible (Granted this can’t be 100% substantiated since typically not a lot is mentioned about most people in those early days before they were 30… the age a man was considered a man in those days) but I feel certain that it can be compared to people from the Bible doing stupid things when they were 90 or 150 since they lived so much longer than we do today.

 

Or is it because we are beginning to feel our own mortality so much more clearly?

– If you read through the Bible, you will note that many of the main characters spoken of in the beginning – after the fall lived for 900+ years. This was not abnormal in those days. However, after the flood, Noah (and possibly his wife) was the last to reportedly live past the 900 year mark.

I don’t know why lifespans suddenly shortened after the flood. And I’m sure there are a thousand different theories. Perhaps it was as simple as the drastic changes on the Earth affecting the human body. Maybe it was all part of God’s plan.

It really doesn’t matter why.

What matters is that it happened. Everything changed on Earth after the flood, except the basic human nature of course.

God destroyed the world because man had become so wicked but what was the first thing Noah did after the flood? He grew himself a vineyard and got drunk.

What did he learn from the experience he had just been through?

Not much in my opinion.

So what can we learn from this?

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God Bless You!

Categories: Children, Daycare, Homeschool, MY Country, parenting, Public School, USA | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Why did you have children?

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OK. Someone explain this to me please.

Why do people have children? No… Really. Why?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Everywhere I look, people are complaining about their children and what a burden they are. I’m not talking about being bugged by the mess kids make. I’m talking about people who can’t wait to get the kids off to daycare or school.

Why do people bother having kids if they don’t want them around? Wouldn’t their lives be easier if they just didn’t have children?

It would certainly be more inexpensive. They would have more time to spend together as a couple. The nuts who go on about overpopulation wouldn’t have so much to fuss or complain about.

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I LOVE my children! They are my life! I don’t even want to think about what my life would be like without them!

There is a reason they call it the “Empty Nest Syndrome”. Because your nest is empty.

And those kids you couldn’t wait to get out of the house… they’re out now. And you start to understand then, just what you missed. You begin to see what you should have seen years ago.

Your kids are only with you for a few short years.

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This very thing is one of the reasons I homeschool. I only have a few years with my children at home. I don’t want to miss a minute!

With homeschool, I don’t have to miss them for eight hours every weekday! We have so much more time together and we all LOVE it!

I can’t begin to imagine what I will do with my days once they grow up and move out.

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Disclaimer: I have no control over the ads you may see below. I am sorry if any of the content is inappropriate.

God Bless You!

Categories: Children, Daycare, Homeschool, parenting, Public School | Tags: , , , , , | Leave a comment

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